A Dog’s Eye View of the World
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- If it’s bigger than you, avoid it.
- If it’s smaller than you, chase it.
- If it’s female, screw it.
- If it’s interesting, sniff it.
- If it’s dirty and horrible, sniff it even more thoroughly.
- If it meows, kill it.
- If it feeds you, suck up to it.
- If you find it, try to eat it.
- If you feel sick (see No 8), chew the spikey green growing stuff.
- If it isn’t any of the above, pee on it.